Day 6 Just another day

Today was interesting in certain ways, but definitely not one for the record books. I got to sleep in, hallelujah, but minutes after I woke up people starting arriving to the house. It was salon da' Steph... It was quite interesting watching the living room turn into a chemical palooza. I'm glad she's beginning to grow a group of clients, I enjoy watching my friends grow. As for the rest of the day, I went to see a movie not worth recommending, the time traveler's wife, i'm usually able to get into movies, but this one was just ehh...I don't know exactly why but I have a feeling that it's because I read the book. As me and kimber were leaving the theater I texted a friend to see if she would pick up a run shift for me. Seconds later I get a phone call from some guy asking who this is, and wondering when I wanted to go for a run. I could hear is friend laughing in the background as soon as he told him he was talking to a girl. Then I cleared up the misunderstanding and asked me if I wanted to go to dinner instead of work tomorrow, and then the conversation ended. I couldn't believe that I just got out by a random wrong number, who does that? I could have been some creepy woman trying to take advantage of men by drugging them and leaving them for dead in the middle of no where. Which gets me wondering, why is it that men really never have to worry about being raped or harassed.. i'm sure there could be a worry about being robbed, but i wonder if it even crosses their minds when they are walking by themselves when the sun goes down. I wonder what it is that men are really afraid of.

I have always worried about them being afraid of me, well i suppose afraid isn't the correct word. Maybe, scared. Well over the years I have had a couple of different experiences with guys involving my virginity, it seems that everyone of them handles the "situation" differently. Some respect it, some get turned on,to some "it's not a big deal" or some run. I always come across the ones who respect it, and the dirt bags that lick their lips at it, it's the other two that are a rarity. "it's not a big deal" always turns out to be more a big deal than they thought. And when they run it's even more frustrating.I think they start thinking about the possibility of them being my first and they get freaked! They create all these scenarios of how it could go down and start feeling some unnecessary pressure, which is always ridiculous. I don't have anything to go on, there really isn't a way of me telling it he's doing something wrong, unless its really wrong. I would like to think that through other things I would be able to tell if it was going good or bad. I would hate to lose a chance of having a good lasting relationship with someone because they were afraid of what could happen. ahhh it's very tricky.

Jaime